The Stripe Club | Christmas Striped Ball Hammock® Pouch Underwear Briefs Size:5X and just like a snow

and just like a snow globe

If you're not planning on being the drunkest kid in the sandbox in these tropical island suit pants

This is the type of jacket your grandpappy wouldn't lend out because he knew he'd never get it back

And if you are at an establishment that does not serve piña coladas

finger traps and scarves made of game tickets

The Stripe Club | Christmas Striped Ball Hammock® Pouch Underwear Briefs Size:5X and just like a snowCome on, thats just Ball Hammock Pouch Briefs with some red and green stripes. So lame. Guess again, jerk! The festive color palette and pattern will make your body look like a present waiting to be unwrapped. And the horizontal stripes will accentuate your curves in all the right places. Oh, and there are also white stripes, idiot.